Have a Funny 2017 with These New Year’s Resolutions


2017_resolutionsWhat New Year’s resolutions did you make for 2017? Be honest – were they the same ones you made for 2016?

Researchers tell us that only 8% of those who make New Year’s resolutions actually achieve their goals.

Perhaps if we made some of these individuals’ resolutions, that statistic would improve:

Buy a more accurate scale.

Stop hanging out with people who ask about my New Year’s resolutions.

My New Year’s resolution is to decipher the obscure meaning of yours.

Accomplish the goals of 2016, which I should have done in 2015 because I promised them in 2014 and planned them in 2013.

My New Year’s resolution was going to be to quit all my bad habits, but then it occurred to me – no one likes a quitter.

My New Year’s resolution is to spend more quality time with you. Will you accept me as a Facebook friend and let me follow you on Twitter?

Since it is tradition to break my New Year’s resolutions, I think this year I’ll try for being lazy and see what happens.

My New Year’s resolution is to simply remember to write the date as 2017, instead of 2016.

My New Year’s resolution is to not make any New Year’s resolutions, and now that I’ve broken it, I’m all done with resolutions this year.